Cold Feet
by qtpiegiggles
Summary: Season 4 second half/My version of what kind of drama there will be.


It was time to realize my feelings. I had been purposely making up reasons to not stay at Ricky's apartment for a whole week. First it was that I wanted to spend some time with my mom who lived palm springs for 5 days and then when I returned back I decide to stay with my dad for 2 more days and tell Ricky I was just staying longer with my mom. The reason behind all of this? Well it started after me and Ricky got engaged at his graduation. I was so happy! Nothing seem to matter. That is until summer school started. When I went to school it seem like all my friends where there and they continue day by day to bring me down with their negative thoughts on our relationship and future. I didn't understand why this was happening. Ricky did everything for me and John. He was never doing anything wrong but yet no one could let go of the fact that he had a bad past and they all believed he must still be a bad guy. Even my parents started in saying I was too young to get married and that Ricky was only doing this to make me happy and that he didn't really want to get married.

The further it got into summer it seems like the worse people would get about their thoughts of Ricky and me and marriage. I would come home so warn out from trying to defend us that I would literally walk in the door, get John ready for bed, eat dinner and pass out. I could tell that Ricky was starting to notice I wasn't acting the same. That my happy normal cheery self wasn't there and he ask me but I just say long day and leave it at that. I didn't want to upset him or make him think that I was starting to have doubts, because that was exactly what was happening. I didn't want to think about that kind of stuff but hearing it day after day it started to sink in. Maybe everyone was right. Maybe Ricky was doing this to make me happy but if that was the case he would be so angry with me in the future and our marriage would turn into something horrible and I didn't want to end up like that.

All I knew was that if I didn't do something soon or I was going to snap. I knew I couldn't do that in front of John or Ricky cause if I was going to end our relationship I would need to do it in nice way to keep the peace for the sake of John and us. That's why I decided to make a trip to see my mom. I talk to her for 5 whole days. That was the longest I had seen her in a whole year. We talked about the good, bad, and the ugly. Every aspect of mine and Ricky's relationship. I even made a pro and con list. Even though I had these negative thoughts it would always come down to how much I loved him and didn't want to lose him as friend and the father of my baby. How he even though we were different we fit. Yeah we had something in common but the different parts always kept us on our toes together. My mom said she didn't want to be the reason we broke up but she just cared about me so much and would hate to see me like her and my dad down the road.

Finally It was time to leave and see my dad. He was a little less negative like my mom. He said that he had grown to love Ricky like family and that he could see the love that grew with time between us and even though he did agree it's possible that maybe Ricky was just doing this because he always wanted a family and wants to make me happy. There is a chance he could be rushing this and that it might end up badly in the end. But he loved us and hoped for the best.

Ricky on the other hand really seem to know something was up because as the longer I was away the more he seem to call me and try talking about the wedding. The last day I was with my dad Ricky finally asks me the question I was dreading. Are you having second thoughts about the wedding? I reply back what? Why would you think that? He went on to say that he had noticed I had been kind of distant and he was starting to worry about me.

Thats when my wall came down and I couldn't hold it in. I started to cry like a baby over the phone. I told him everything. I mean everything from the conversations at school, to my parents, and even that I had lied to him about being at my mom's for the past two days. After all this came out I started to actually feel better. I mean I had been talking to my mom for five days but to actually tell Ricky seemed a whole lot better. I figure since he finally knew what was going on maybe he say or do something that would show me how he felt and get me to make up an answer.

But it didn't go exactly as planned. All I heard was silence and the phone went dead. All I could do was curl in a ball and cry. I cry so much and so hard I eventually fell asleep. I woke up the next morning to my dad staring at me. He said that Ricky came by and dropped John off and ask to keep him for a few hours. I try to call his phone but it was turned off. I called the butcher shop to see if Bunny knew if he was at home and she said he has been gone since early this morning. All I knew was this was not a good sign.

After hours of feeling like I had the worse butterflies in my stomach and time going by ever so slowly, he finally came back to the house around 5 p.m. He first talks to my dad in the kitchen. At this time I was in my room with my headphones on so I had no idea he was even here. Then he walked into my room. I jumped up as soon as I saw him. I said hi and where were you? He replied back to I need to have time to myself. I need to answer that question to myself that everyone had been asking and telling you. The part about me only being with you to make you happy and not me happy.

I looked up at him with big eyes. And? And after talking to my therapist and my mom's and dad. I have no doubt Amy that I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I have always wanted to spend my days with you. Before we were a couple and I would come to visit John I would day dream about you and I. I never thought you be ready to date me and now look at us we are engaged. Things are the best. I just got so made because it hurt my feelings thinking you want to check out of this relationship. What's going on? I mean are you? Why would you want to listen to all of those people? You know what they all have in common. Not a single one of them are in a happy relationship so they have nothing better than to rain on us with their negative comments.

So what do you want? Do you want to set a date? Do you want out of this relationship? What do you want?

With that all I could say was ... YOU! I jumped up with the biggest smile and ran over to his arms. We both kissed like we were never going to see each other and didn't want to let go. After what seem like 10 minutes. Finally I pulled away and said but wait. I need you to promise me something. Please please...If you ever get angry with our marriage can we please try to work on it before we call it quits? I don't want to end up like my parents. I don't want to be back and forth. I don't want to ruin our son's life. I just want one big happy family!

Ricky looked deep into my eyes and smiled and said so do I! And with that I knew that we were going to make it. So that night back at the apartment we got ready for bed. All snuggled up on the sofa bed we lay there holding hands and talking about our wedding. We thought long and hard about date we should choose. Finally Ricky looked at me and said how about next summer after you have graduated, your 18, and let's make it the day that John was conceived. I looked up at him and replied back you remember what day that was? And he said of course I do. You don't think I could ever forget the first time I was with you. Even though the sex wasn't that great because we Both were so nervous, it still was a top three moment with you. With that I couldn't help but kiss him. It started out slowly. It was such a turn on I found myself pulling myself straddling him. Then before I knew it we were undressing and make sweet love.

And with that we were in the moment I guess we both forgot to use a condom and well ...9 months later before the wedding day we had a little bundle of Joy!

The End!


End file.
